I Love You - Unconditionally

Every now and then I find myself wondering what life would be like if we'd never been blessed by the boys coming into our family. How would life be now? I can answer that in one word... boring. Not for any reason other than the only way for me to answer that at this point is from, well, my current perspective.

Like many people (I'm sure), I've asked myself many times... if I could "cure" my boys of autism, would I? It makes me realize that the question is not an easy one to answer. There are many aspects of ASD (autism spectrum disorder) that are positive and many negative. Like everything in life, it makes you really think about your life, your loved ones and your family situation.

If I had a magic wand, I suppose I'd "pick and choose" between the qualities I thought were good and bad. After all, what other criteria would I have to go by? I'd get rid of the "meltdowns" -  I'd increase their speech... a lot. I'd give them great social skills so they could play with other kiddos, instead of alongside. I think next, I'd remove the regression they went through, so they would have continued learning all along. Then, just for good measure, I'd remove the "developmental delay" so they didn't have to "work" so hard on the other skills they need.

After all that, I'd remove any need for medication, and of course, I'd take away the SPD (sensory processing disorder). Then I'd take away whatever it is that makes my babes wake up in the middle of the night, an stay awake for hours on end - so they'd be able to get a good night's sleep.

I'm sure I could change many more things, but by this point of the "daydream" I realize that I've already taken away most of what makes my boys... my precious, beautiful, and special boys. So I start to realize that I am grateful that there is no magic wand. After all, if there was - wouldn't we all have the perfect children?   

I believe that we have all been fearfully and wonderfully made to be just who we are. That God created us all to be exactly the way we are. Who am I to think I could improve on his handiwork. After all, I know that nothing, absolutely nothing could change the way I love my children... unconditionally.

From a mother's heart - I have faith that we are right where we are suppose to be. You are loved unconditionally by the One who created you. You are special! You are right where you are suppose to be.
God Bless!