Saturday, November 2, 2013

Trials and Blessings in Disguise

There are so many times when I hear how "blessed my boys are" to have us as parents. I don't want to make light of the comment, I believe we are all blessed that God put us together as a family. However, I get the occasional funny looks from some people when I respond that we are the ones who are truly blessed and grateful.
blessings

I have always been a blunt person who, unfortunately has a slight real problem with the "filter" between my brain and my mouth. I am usually a much better writer than speaker - I can get my point across much easier when I write. I have no issue with speaking up when it comes to rude looks, stares or comments made... if I feel it's warranted. Sometimes I am "moved" to just keep my mouth shut. I'm sure that every parent or caregiver of someone with any type of special needs kiddos are in the same boat.
speak
As a parent, we are called to figure out many things as our kiddos grow. As babies - learn the cries in order to know quickly what your baby needs. Then you get to figure out their way of communicating to tell you what they want. You learn to "read" your child as to what they need, sometimes before they even know. Now, as a parent of a kiddo with autism, you are called to be a teacher, doctor, dentist, nutritionist, advocate, mind reader, body language interpreter, but mostly... a detective.
IMG_1344detective
We know that ASD (autism spectrum disorder) is different with every child, even with identical twins, some issues are similar, many are different. The hardest part is filling these different roles and learning how to cope with them, then teach your child what you can to help them cope as well. We have to learn that "mommies and daddies" need time outs too. Then we can look at situations that have developed with "fresh eyes" and try to find a solution, if there is one". Then of course you have to try to figure a way to communicate with your kiddo, especially if they are non-verbal. Then you have to figure out how to spot the "trigger" for the meltdowns in hopes of stopping them before they escalate.

We learn (from them):
  • to see things from a different perspective that we otherwise never would.
  • that there isn't always a logical reason for something (to us), but is important to our kiddo.
  • the way our senses work - who would of thought that our senses could be over-whelming to our own body? So we learn even more about our own senses.
  • we usually pay more attention to our little ones when something's wrong. (Like they're sick, or upset, etc.) This allows us to become closer to our kiddos.
  • how to really reach out to our children with autism, especially when they are none verbal to try every way possible to connect with them.
  • how to look for ways to correct our children that don't involve physical means, but actually work
  • to say what we mean, because most kiddos with ASD are extremely literal.
  • that some of our kiddos actually show us what pure, innocent and complete joy is
learn
I think Laura Story's song blessings says it all. Check it out if you haven't heard it or seen this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1CSVqHcdhXQ

From a mother's heart - Every time we learn something new we are being let into, a little more each time, our child's world. Which to me is the biggest blessing of all. May we all notice the blessings and learn the lessons our children have to teach us.
God Bless!  

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